Sometimes I can't sleep at night.
Not because of Twitter or Instagram or music.
Sometimes I just lay there and think.
Not about my mistakes or over thinking what happened that day.
I think about my future.
Changing the world, graduating high school. (In no particular order)
Going to college, leaving the country, serving a mission.
Getting a college degree, meeting my husband, getting married in the temple.
What I might be most excited for, next to getting married, is to be a mother.
Having kids.
Painting their bedroom walls, eating Popsicles on the back porch with them.
Rubbing their backs when they lay their head on my lap in church.
Watching my husband coach their city league sports games and sitting on a blanket in the grass cheering way to loudly.
Making pillow forts in the basement and leaving them there so we can nap in them after church on Sunday. Going to the zoo and walking around for hours covered in sunscreen and animal smells. Singing them songs at night and then waiting in the kitchen because I know they'll want another drink of water before they can sleep.
Waking up and saying prayers and eating oatmeal. Doing homework and driving carpools and doing all of the messy things. Painting pictures and staining our new shirts because we forgot aprons.
No matter what titles, positions, or degrees I get in this life.. I honestly can't express how exciting and humbling I imagine it to be called "mommy". To bring spirits into this world and raise them and love them just sounds magical, am I right?
And this probably sounds goofy because this won't be happening for another ten years. But I'm still excited. They say that high school is the best time of your life, I don't believe that. I think that the best time of your life will be when you've found the love of your life and you're raising kids you didn't think was possible to love any more.
I hope that I can live my life worthy enough to raise Heavenly Father's children. And to teach them the gospel, and to watch them grow up and make a difference in our world. I think that sounds like happiness.
xoxoxo,
ella
P.S. I moved my blog from Blogger to a Wordpress. FINALLY. So here is the new adress to my blog. Same posts and everything! So go and follow! Thank you!
Monday, January 28, 2013
Monday, January 21, 2013
MLK
How long does it take for a person to change their life?
Is there a right answer to this question?
Maybe it's the three years it takes to go through high school that a person's life is truly changed?
The two years that you choose to serve a mission?
Or is it the three hours you spend in church on Sunday?
I don't think it's any of these things. I think it's in the seconds, in the moments that fill up these hours.
The smile that you give to a random person in class. The fifteen seconds it takes to pull your car over and ask a stranger if they want a ride. The thirty cents that you decide to drop in the change jar after getting your breakfast burrito.
The hand that you reach for, even though it makes you extremely nervous. The time you say no to something that you want but you shouldn't have.
I think that you can change your life every second. Every 60 seconds a new minute starts. A whole sixty seconds to do something different. A minute to look outside yourself and maybe even change someone else's life.
Don't wait for Sunday or New Year's or making a horrible mistake to change your life.
One person's actions have the power to change the universe.
Martin Luther King Jr. once said,
"The time is always right to do what is right."
MLK didn't wait for someone else to make a change. He changed his country, he changed his life, and he gave his life.
If you wait for the right time to change your life, it will never come. You're not going to find that moment anywhere.
So do it today. Whatever it is you're wanting to pursue, or create or leave behind. Today can be the day that you change your life.
xoxo,
ella
Is there a right answer to this question?
Maybe it's the three years it takes to go through high school that a person's life is truly changed?
The two years that you choose to serve a mission?
Or is it the three hours you spend in church on Sunday?
I don't think it's any of these things. I think it's in the seconds, in the moments that fill up these hours.
The smile that you give to a random person in class. The fifteen seconds it takes to pull your car over and ask a stranger if they want a ride. The thirty cents that you decide to drop in the change jar after getting your breakfast burrito.
The hand that you reach for, even though it makes you extremely nervous. The time you say no to something that you want but you shouldn't have.
I think that you can change your life every second. Every 60 seconds a new minute starts. A whole sixty seconds to do something different. A minute to look outside yourself and maybe even change someone else's life.
Don't wait for Sunday or New Year's or making a horrible mistake to change your life.
One person's actions have the power to change the universe.
Martin Luther King Jr. once said,
"The time is always right to do what is right."
MLK didn't wait for someone else to make a change. He changed his country, he changed his life, and he gave his life.
If you wait for the right time to change your life, it will never come. You're not going to find that moment anywhere.
So do it today. Whatever it is you're wanting to pursue, or create or leave behind. Today can be the day that you change your life.
xoxo,
ella
Sunday, January 20, 2013
Take Care
Warning: This post has nothing to do with the musical artist Drake. But I figure if I titled it that way maybe more people would read it? YA SUE ME.
Life is hard. People are hard on themselves. What's my advice?
Skip the gym, eat some cookie dough.
Take a nap.
Bake a birthday cake for no reason and eat the biggest slice while watching your favorite music videos.
Wear your hair naturally curly. Spend more money than you should.
Say no to somebody.
Take the long way home from work just so you can look at the mountains. Text that somebody who makes you happy , don't play hard to get.
Be selfish for ten minutes of your day.
Do something for yourself. Take care of yourself.
xoxoxo,
ella
Life is hard. People are hard on themselves. What's my advice?
Skip the gym, eat some cookie dough.
Take a nap.
Bake a birthday cake for no reason and eat the biggest slice while watching your favorite music videos.
Wear your hair naturally curly. Spend more money than you should.
Say no to somebody.
Take the long way home from work just so you can look at the mountains. Text that somebody who makes you happy , don't play hard to get.
Be selfish for ten minutes of your day.
Do something for yourself. Take care of yourself.
xoxoxo,
ella
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
New Year. Same You.
Twenty thirteen.
Such a weird word to roll off my tongue.
But it makes my soul shiver with excitement when I think about everything that I'm going to experience.
I'm already excited for the songs that I'll listen to. The summer anthems that we'll scream out of my sun roof. The songs that will make us sad inside because they remind us that we don't know when we will see each other again.
The nights that you stay up late buying as many McDonald's hash browns as you can and talking about everything you're grateful for. The nights that you feel like you just met someone for the first time again because you felt something amazing with them. Or the nights that you'll drive around listening to old mix CDs and thinking of your friends back home, but you're happy because this new chapter in your life is exciting.
The feelings. Oh the feeling of walking into a room not knowing a single face. But it's wonderful because at the same time nobody knows you, your mistakes, your secrets or your story. It's a new start. What about the unforgettable feeling you get when you see a stranger and for some reason you get really excited. For that flash of a moment you want to know everything about them and spend many more moments with them. And before another moment can begin, they're walking out the door and you're standing there wondering what just happened.
New can be beautiful. New can be exhilarating and breath taking. New can be slightly cold and awkward and may take some time to get used to. New can be scary and soul shaking.
There's going to be challenges, heartbreaks, and days of feeling lonely or lost. There's going to be days where you doubt yourself, when you don't know where you are going or if you made the right decision.
There is going to be days where you just want to sing (and you should, loudly). There will be days of butterflies and dancing in your living room and calling your best friend because they won't belive who finally texted you.
But no matter what this new year holds, you're still the same you. You're still the same, perfect, child of God that was created to overcome new obstacles and reach great heights. You have your testimony, your faith, and your Heavenly Father. Those things will never change and they are infinite.
I hope you all embrace the new year and don't back down from anything that comes your way! Get weird and get happy!
xoxoxo,
ella
"Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark in the hopeless swamps of the not-quite, the not-yet, and the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish in lonely frustration for the life you deserved and have never been able to reach. The world you desire can be won. It exists.. it is real.. it is possible.. it's yours.” -Ayn Rand.
Now playing: Give a Little Love, Blue Skies, and Our Window by Noah & The Whale
Such a weird word to roll off my tongue.
But it makes my soul shiver with excitement when I think about everything that I'm going to experience.
I'm already excited for the songs that I'll listen to. The summer anthems that we'll scream out of my sun roof. The songs that will make us sad inside because they remind us that we don't know when we will see each other again.
The nights that you stay up late buying as many McDonald's hash browns as you can and talking about everything you're grateful for. The nights that you feel like you just met someone for the first time again because you felt something amazing with them. Or the nights that you'll drive around listening to old mix CDs and thinking of your friends back home, but you're happy because this new chapter in your life is exciting.
The feelings. Oh the feeling of walking into a room not knowing a single face. But it's wonderful because at the same time nobody knows you, your mistakes, your secrets or your story. It's a new start. What about the unforgettable feeling you get when you see a stranger and for some reason you get really excited. For that flash of a moment you want to know everything about them and spend many more moments with them. And before another moment can begin, they're walking out the door and you're standing there wondering what just happened.
New can be beautiful. New can be exhilarating and breath taking. New can be slightly cold and awkward and may take some time to get used to. New can be scary and soul shaking.
There's going to be challenges, heartbreaks, and days of feeling lonely or lost. There's going to be days where you doubt yourself, when you don't know where you are going or if you made the right decision.
There is going to be days where you just want to sing (and you should, loudly). There will be days of butterflies and dancing in your living room and calling your best friend because they won't belive who finally texted you.
But no matter what this new year holds, you're still the same you. You're still the same, perfect, child of God that was created to overcome new obstacles and reach great heights. You have your testimony, your faith, and your Heavenly Father. Those things will never change and they are infinite.
I hope you all embrace the new year and don't back down from anything that comes your way! Get weird and get happy!
xoxoxo,
ella
"Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark in the hopeless swamps of the not-quite, the not-yet, and the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish in lonely frustration for the life you deserved and have never been able to reach. The world you desire can be won. It exists.. it is real.. it is possible.. it's yours.” -Ayn Rand.
Now playing: Give a Little Love, Blue Skies, and Our Window by Noah & The Whale
Sunday, December 16, 2012
There Is A Green Hill Far Away.
There is a green hill far away,
Without a city wall,
Where the dear Lord was crucified,
Who died to save us all.
We may not know, we cannot tell
What pains He had to bear;
But we believe it was for us
He hung and suffered there.
There was no other good enough,
To pay the price of sin;
He only could unlock the gate
Of Heav'n and let us in.
Oh, dearly, dearly has He loved,
And we must love Him too;
And trust in His redeeming blood,
And try His works to do.
Like many of you, I can't stop thinking about the shooting that happened on Friday and how much grief has come because of it. So many hearts and homes broken. So many tears shed and lives lost.
The idea that someone could take away something so much potential and so much life is unbelievable. I feel my very soul is crying out in despair and grief when I think about the little hands that will never be held again by their parents. Or the little back packs hung at the back of the classroom, never again to be filled with sandwiches or spelling tests.
In the midst of this massacre there is nothing more comforting than knowing that when they got to heaven those children were greeted by someone who loves them more than life itself. Their Savior died for them so that they could live again one day. He died for all of us. He died for me, he died for you.
He also died for Adam Lanza. Yes. The ill minded young man who destroyed so many lives. The man that so many of us have sent to rot in hell so many times. Heavenly Father loves that young man just as much as he loves the six and seven year olds of Sandy Hook Elementary School.
Heavenly Father greeted Adam Lanza with the same understanding and forgiveness that he will give to you and me. I imagine his eyes overflowing with tears as he embraced one of his precious children who had so cruelly abused the free agency he was given.
I know it's hard to think that such a man could even be worthy of the understanding and forgiveness of our Heavenly Father. But that is why the gospel is so beautiful. Because we are all children of a loving Heavenly Father. And we all have an older brother who "died to save us all."
It doesn't matter what you've done or where you've been in your life. It doesn't matter how tortured your soul or how tired your heart. Jesus Christ has and always will love you.
Heavenly Father has a plan for every one of his sons and daughters. They will live again one day and so will we through the power of the Atonement and the sacrifice of our Savior Jesus Christ. I hope we can all "try His works to do" and find room in our hearts to be forgiving of those who have done wrong in our world.
xoxo,
ella
Without a city wall,
Where the dear Lord was crucified,
Who died to save us all.
We may not know, we cannot tell
What pains He had to bear;
But we believe it was for us
He hung and suffered there.
There was no other good enough,
To pay the price of sin;
He only could unlock the gate
Of Heav'n and let us in.
Oh, dearly, dearly has He loved,
And we must love Him too;
And trust in His redeeming blood,
And try His works to do.
Like many of you, I can't stop thinking about the shooting that happened on Friday and how much grief has come because of it. So many hearts and homes broken. So many tears shed and lives lost.
The idea that someone could take away something so much potential and so much life is unbelievable. I feel my very soul is crying out in despair and grief when I think about the little hands that will never be held again by their parents. Or the little back packs hung at the back of the classroom, never again to be filled with sandwiches or spelling tests.
In the midst of this massacre there is nothing more comforting than knowing that when they got to heaven those children were greeted by someone who loves them more than life itself. Their Savior died for them so that they could live again one day. He died for all of us. He died for me, he died for you.
He also died for Adam Lanza. Yes. The ill minded young man who destroyed so many lives. The man that so many of us have sent to rot in hell so many times. Heavenly Father loves that young man just as much as he loves the six and seven year olds of Sandy Hook Elementary School.
Heavenly Father greeted Adam Lanza with the same understanding and forgiveness that he will give to you and me. I imagine his eyes overflowing with tears as he embraced one of his precious children who had so cruelly abused the free agency he was given.
I know it's hard to think that such a man could even be worthy of the understanding and forgiveness of our Heavenly Father. But that is why the gospel is so beautiful. Because we are all children of a loving Heavenly Father. And we all have an older brother who "died to save us all."
It doesn't matter what you've done or where you've been in your life. It doesn't matter how tortured your soul or how tired your heart. Jesus Christ has and always will love you.
Heavenly Father has a plan for every one of his sons and daughters. They will live again one day and so will we through the power of the Atonement and the sacrifice of our Savior Jesus Christ. I hope we can all "try His works to do" and find room in our hearts to be forgiving of those who have done wrong in our world.
xoxo,
ella
Monday, November 26, 2012
Win-Win
LOLZ Guess what Matt Damon. SOMETIMES NOTHING GOOD COMES OF IT.“You know, sometimes all you need is 20 seconds of insane courage. Just literally 20 seconds of just embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it.”
Yep. Sometimes you put yourself out there and get nothing in return. Hash tag WHAT WAS I THINKING.
You feel awkward, embarrassed, and you feel a whole ton of regret. But, you can't change what has happened. SO... You hate yourself for an hour or so and then YOU GET OVER IT.
Life is full of disappointments, but with out those moments, you wouldn't appreciate all the great things that happen to you.
Things go your way? You're happy? HASH TAG WINNING.
If something doesn't work out the way you planned, you learn something. HASH TAG STILL WINNING.
Life is a win-win situation.
You learn and you lose and you gain something from everything you go through.
Plus, all the awkward and dumb stuff you do make for the best stories right?
So don't get down on yourself if you don't get the job, you don't get the boy or girl, or you look like a total idiot sometimes.
If worse comes to worse turn on some Ke$ha, go get weird with your best friends, eat tons of gummy candies and dance it all off.
xoxoxo,
ella
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
First Things First
Good morning babez.
I had one of those late nights last night and things got real deep via telephone with one of my best friends Debora Figueroa (18, gorgeous, Argentine and one of the greatest people on the planet). We were talking about boys (are you surprised? You shouldn't be).
GOOD NEWS. YOU CAN BE HAPPY WHEN EVER YOU WANT!
Want to know how? Keep reading.
Focus on others. Nobody wants to be with somebody who is complaining about how hard their life is because they don't have a boyf and how much Netflix they watch by themselves. We are all feeling lonely, after a while doesn't it get old feeling sad for yourself? Go cheer somebody else up and soon you'll be smiling too! Pinky swear.
It's what's on the inside that counts. No matter how big your biceps or how long your lashes are, nobody wants to date a crummy person. Focus on developing Christ-like qualities and striving to do better! The more beautiful you are on the inside, the more beautiful you will be on the outside. We all should know that by now.
Don't be so hard on yourself. This is the most important one, for me at least. Perfection isn't going to happen in this life. You can't read your scriptures, say your prayers, get good grades, have a perfect bod and be dating the person from your dreams. Some day that will happen, it's possible. But it's not going to happen over night. Don't be dissapointed in yourself if you don't have all of those things or any of those things at all. Strive towards being your best self and take it day by day, everything else will follow.
You deserve the best. You deserve to be happy! You deserve to use smiley face emojis to your hearts content. You deserve to jump around your room and do a funny little dance to the beat of your heart for no reason at all. You deserve to sing to your favorite band at the top of your lungs on your way home from work and not care about a thing in the world. You deserve to feel great about yourself. Don't let the lack of a BF/BF let you feel otherwise.
So don't wait around for some boy to magically call you up while eating your weight in yogurt and listening to Pandora on a weekend (guilty). He will come along but you have to be going down that road to begin with.
BE GOLD TO FIND GOLD.
Be the kind of person you want to meet.
Make yourself happy and love yourself FIRST and others will come second. Find yourself first. Have faith in yourself first. And some day someone will come along, and they will be just what you have been waiting for. It probably won't be tomorrow. It might not be this month, it might not even be this winter. But it will happen. AND IT WILL ROCK OKAY?
So keep your heads, hearts, and spirits high. Good things are in store for you!
xoxoxoxo,
ella
I had one of those late nights last night and things got real deep via telephone with one of my best friends Debora Figueroa (18, gorgeous, Argentine and one of the greatest people on the planet). We were talking about boys (are you surprised? You shouldn't be).
We were talking about how sometimes it can be SO HARD sometimes (okay like all of the time) when the person you like doesn't like you back. Don't judge us, you feel the same way too! No matter how many BFF pep talks you have or Pinterest quotes you come across, it's hard to be happy when that guy or girl isn't crushing back. You compare yourself to their crush, to their ex, or to other friends who are happily "in like" with somebody. You tell yourself that you can't be happy or that you'll be #foreveralone (hello most used hash tag ever, you need to STOP).
GOOD NEWS. YOU CAN BE HAPPY WHEN EVER YOU WANT!
Want to know how? Keep reading.
Focus on others. Nobody wants to be with somebody who is complaining about how hard their life is because they don't have a boyf and how much Netflix they watch by themselves. We are all feeling lonely, after a while doesn't it get old feeling sad for yourself? Go cheer somebody else up and soon you'll be smiling too! Pinky swear.
It's what's on the inside that counts. No matter how big your biceps or how long your lashes are, nobody wants to date a crummy person. Focus on developing Christ-like qualities and striving to do better! The more beautiful you are on the inside, the more beautiful you will be on the outside. We all should know that by now.
Don't be so hard on yourself. This is the most important one, for me at least. Perfection isn't going to happen in this life. You can't read your scriptures, say your prayers, get good grades, have a perfect bod and be dating the person from your dreams. Some day that will happen, it's possible. But it's not going to happen over night. Don't be dissapointed in yourself if you don't have all of those things or any of those things at all. Strive towards being your best self and take it day by day, everything else will follow.
You deserve the best. You deserve to be happy! You deserve to use smiley face emojis to your hearts content. You deserve to jump around your room and do a funny little dance to the beat of your heart for no reason at all. You deserve to sing to your favorite band at the top of your lungs on your way home from work and not care about a thing in the world. You deserve to feel great about yourself. Don't let the lack of a BF/BF let you feel otherwise.
So don't wait around for some boy to magically call you up while eating your weight in yogurt and listening to Pandora on a weekend (guilty). He will come along but you have to be going down that road to begin with.
BE GOLD TO FIND GOLD.
Be the kind of person you want to meet.
Make yourself happy and love yourself FIRST and others will come second. Find yourself first. Have faith in yourself first. And some day someone will come along, and they will be just what you have been waiting for. It probably won't be tomorrow. It might not be this month, it might not even be this winter. But it will happen. AND IT WILL ROCK OKAY?
So keep your heads, hearts, and spirits high. Good things are in store for you!
xoxoxoxo,
ella
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